Saturday, March 17, 2012

Week 26 Milestone

Last week one of the many doctors made the promise that I could possibly go home on Friday or Monday. Friday came and went, but Sunday night, I got the good news that I would be discharged on Monday as long as nothing happened...and nothing happened! The babies continue to grow big and healthy. Their hearts sound amazing on the heart monitor. By the end of this stay, they had started kicking the monitors. I'm convinced they had gotten used to them and thought it was a fun game to play. After seeing how much the monitors bounced, Bryan played "November Rain" by Guns 'N Roses on my tummy and the phone bounced a bunch, and one powerful quick got it to flip up some and then land back in place.
Although I still have contractions, I don't feel the majority of them. I usually feel about 5-6 total in a day, all at random times with no specific pattern. During monitoring, I will have a couple big ones, but we figure most of this happens because the monitors are strapped tight around me and the babies are kicking. The shortening hasn't progressed (yet), and I'm still at 1.7 cm, which is equivalent to about .43 inches. The bed rest is helping, depending on the doctor you ask. One doctor mentioned it's all 'voodoo' science, as there's not much proof behind bed rest.
Monday morning the monitoring went really well and so the okay was given for me to be discharged from the hospital. Bryan came and gathered all my things, and a hospital volunteer brought a wheelchair for me and took me down to the front entrance, my escape. It was surreal seeing our G8 idling with the door held open and a huge smile on Bryan's face. I truly was getting to leave. As we started to drive away, I burst into tears. To think -- I'd made it to the first milestone of 26 weeks, and was doing so well I could leave. Some of the nurses had told me to not be upset if I ended up back in the hospital. They said the likelihood was quite high. The combination of my small body, a uterus that is stretched to max and ready to be done, two babies that are huge, and a shortened cervix were a recipe for preterm labor being a reality more than once. However, they don't know I will be the best mommy ever and obey the directions from the doctors.
We came straight home and I slowly waddled to our room. I've only been from the bed to bathroom. And it's more than enough exercise for me. Our two little ones are at 2 lbs 3 oz and 2 lbs, so I've got a total of 4 lbs of just baby. It's amazing how heavy they really are.
It's brilliant being home. I love being able to lay next to my Bryan. While I was in the hospital, I joked with him it was like we were dating again...but somehow it wasn't quite kosher as I was knocked up! Being surrounded by your own things and the comforts of your home is bliss. Now the trick is getting to week 28 and still be at home. Fingers are crossed, knocking on wood, wishing on eyelashes, throwing salt over my shoulder...

Friday, March 9, 2012

Goals in Baby Steps

It's been a really long week. The first couple days were spent trying to get my contractions under control. Then the next couple days were spent getting steroid shots and magnesium just in case the babies did come early (the steroids are for their lungs to help with breathing air, as they're not fully developed at just 24 weeks, and the magnesium is to help with their neurological development). Then it's been blood draws every day, along with an IV of antibiotics and now iron. The doctors are befuddled. There's been research done which shows the white blood cells start moving in preparation and release enzymes that begin to break down the tissue of the cervix for when a baby is ready to be born. My test results show my white blood cells are moving. After three straight days of blood draws at 6 am (and believe me, it's very strange waking up to state your name and DOB then get poked for blood), one of the maternal fetal specialists made the call to stop the blood draws. She decided there was no point in freaking out about this particular test result. My cervix has gone from 1 cm to 1.7 cm, which is great news. I figured once I started to 'flatten out', there was no going back. I was monitored for my contractions up until Tuesday, when the doctors decided to stop that as well because there was no rhyme or reason to them. I have many all day long, but I rarely feel any of them.
Today I got approved to go on a wheelchair ride. Bryan took me down to the cafeteria and we got individual pizzas. It was wonderful to get out of my 6x6 room, even though it was still within the hospital city limits. The nurses are all very sweet, and I have a sneaking suspicion they beg to have me as their patient. The nurse I had today, Erin, made the comment I was very low maintenance, and kept reminding me I am more than welcome to bug them for any and everything. They all can't believe how much work I do each day, and were blown away by how little the magnesium affected me. They kept asking me over and over again "Aren't you on magnesium?" I was affected, as I had become a normal human being, but they don't know me well enough to realize my super human powers were zapped. I also was moved to the penthouse suite. It's the only room on the maternity floor that has a view of nature, rather than hospital or parking structure. I watched the sunrise yesterday. The pinks and oranges were beautiful, and I was glad the northwest weather had abated just for me.
All of this is frustrating. I long to go home and continue bed rest from there, but then I have second thoughts and realize I probably really should be still here in the hospital. The maternal fetal specialist commented today it's better to be here, than for years question yourself with the What Ifs, if in fact the worst happened. The current goal is to keep me here until 26 weeks, which is 1 week away. Then my status will be re-evaluated and a new goal will be made. I have a feeling I will probably be here until week 28. I truly hope not, but if so, at least I know the babies are still growing inside me where they should be, and not inside incubators.
My sanity is being kept by my work each day, and the daily phone calls and texts from family. My boss today talked about what could be done to help me, meaning what work could be taken away, and I found myself almost begging to keep it, as I need it to keep my mind from wandering into shark infested waters. I'm also glad hospitals have gone away from the no cell phone days, as not having that connection to the outside world would be difficult. The many thoughtful texts and phone calls I've received have helped the time to pass and allowed me to vent my frustrations and worries, and helped me see how many care about our small family. But the highlight of every day is the 20-30 minutes I get each morning when the babies' heartbeats are monitored. The sounds of their racing hearts is soothing to my ears, and I love listening to them gallop wildly along. Who would've thought I would find something I would actually miss about hospital bed rest?

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Twin Twist

Yesterday I went in for a regular ultrasound and learned my cervix had shortened significantly and the doctor was worried. I was monitored for contractions but nothing happened so I was sent home on strict orders of bed rest and to call if any cramping or contractions started. It was really hard to not get emotional, as I had been determined to not have to be a bed rest mommy, and the idea of our twins coming early really worried me. I did as the doctor said and went straight home to my bed. It was weird asking Bryan to run and get this and that, especially since I didn't feel 'sick' at all. During the middle of the night I awoke to some sharp pains on my left side and it was murderous trying to lay on that side. I sat up in frustration as sleeping's been uncomfortable for weeks. A few moments later after having some water and getting over my frustration, I realized my belly was tightening really hard. I shook Bryan awake in panic. I drank a bunch of water and laid down again, but a second contraction happened. We called the on call doctor, and were told if I had 4 more contractions within 40 minutes to go to the hospital. Forty minutes later Bryan had a bag packed for me and we headed north. Bryan was so sweet and found me a wheelchair so I wouldn't have to walk (since I am on bed rest orders). He wheeled me to Labor & Delivery and although I felt so strange, and knew I wasn't really in labor, I picked up the night phone and told the nurse "I'm pregnant with twins, am at 24 weeks and have started having..." and the doors swung open. They knew just from those few words what was happening and got me in right away. I truly wasn't expecting to "labor and deliver", just get my contractions under control and go home. So far, it hasn't been the case. Although I've had a couple shots and some pills to help with stopping the contractions, they keep coming back. They are becoming less strong, but not less frequent. The doctor who had seen me yesterday felt terrible for letting me go home, but I was fine with it. At least I knew what a contraction was now. Plus I knew my twins and I were in good hands. I've joked with the nurses it's because we have car seats and a crib, and maybe the fact we've settled on some names. I'm too prepared, and the babies knew it. But deep down, I know it's not the babies, nor is it something I did. My tiny frame doesn't allow for much growing room, and my uterus probably feels like it's stretched to the max and ready to be done. Too bad for it, as I'm not, nor are the babies. We're staying as we are, until at least 34 weeks. So for now, I have the most fortunate circumstances of hospital bed rest. The doctor and nurses are glad I can do work from 'home' as the boredom will get old quickly, and I have many a hobby to keep me busy too. I don't know that even being in the hospital is all that bad, as I'll have more interaction with people than I would at home...but it is only day 1. Hopefully it's only for a few days, and not a few weeks, or few months.